About The Poem

Thoughts of Intrusion is a spiritual warfare poem about the exhausting reality of intrusive thoughts. Before coming to Christ, intrusive thoughts were a daily thing for me. They first appeared in 2018, went away for a while, and then returned in 2021 (the year I came to Christ). The thoughts were so terrifying and often brought me to tears. I didn’t know why they were happening. When I look back, I can see they were spiritual attacks, but back then I was so confused and scared because no matter what I did, they wouldn’t go away: “Thoughts are getting heavy and intrusive. Bruising up my mind…“

The thoughts I experienced were very intense, and it got to a point where all I did was sleep all day, literally, so I wouldn’t have to think: “Sleeping… So I won’t have to think. Sweet dreams were my escape.” I felt the safest while sleeping, because it provided a sense of “relief.” “If I sleep, the thoughts wouldn’t be able to torment me.” I didn’t want to force a happy ending on Thoughts of Intrusion. The happy ending was me coming to Jesus, but for this poem I wanted to highlight the battles fought within the mind. Our mind is where the battle takes place. If your mind is not fixed on Jesus, you will succumb to fear, doubt, temptations, and negative thinking. I couldn’t run away from my own mind, but I could (and did) run to Jesus.

Thoughts of Intrusion

Thoughts are getting heavy
and intrusive.
Bruising up my mind
Taking up my time
So tired of life —
Will it always be this way?

Are these thoughts a lie?
Or the story of my life?
The wires in my mind —
Are they connected?

Feeling disconnected
from my reality.
Interrogate my mind
to find the truth.
“Hello, mind, are these things
true about us?”
“Is this how we’re really
feeling inside?”

Drinking my tears
to keep a piece of sanity.
Sleeping… So I won’t have to think.
Sweet dreams were my escape,
but my mistake —
You can’t run away from
your own mind.